Monthly Archives: May 2015

Resisting reality makes you unhappy

Gratitude

Just think about it for a second. Perhaps it has been raining constantly for many days and you long for the sun to shine, but no matter how much you whine about the bad weather, wishing the sun was there, the weather is not going to change. At least not because of anything you did.

Luckily I’m sensible enough to understand that I can’t control the weather, and I really try not to allow bad weather to affect my mood. As I live in Iceland the weather can be very unpredictable, and now in the beginning of May, we still have snow…

All the same, I sometimes fall into the rut of wishing things were different, fighting reality instead of accepting it, and I have discovered that it really makes me unhappy.

Mostly this happens in relation to my health. As I’ve got fibromyalgia, I sometimes get what’s called fibro flare, and then all my symptoms get considerably worse for some time. My latest flare has been ongoing since January, and what has been the most challenging task for me is not coping physically with the pain, fatigue and other debilitating symptoms. No, the most challenging thing is accepting my situation. Stop fighting it! Sadly I must admit I’m not doing a great job in that department.

Not accepting my reality, constantly wishing things were different, only leads to one thing. Unhappiness and depression. Well those were two things .. but you get my point.

So I’ve decided I need a new strategy to cope, and I’ve chosen gratefulness as my first tool. From now on I’m going to write a gratitude journal. Each day before I go to sleep I will write in my journal at least three things I’m grateful for in my life. I intend to focus on things that happened that day, in order to make pleasant memories more prominent in my brain.

I’m going to use a notebook, but there’s even an app for this. It can be found here, and costs only 1,99 in iTunes. Maybe I’ll try that later.

My goal is to write in my journal each day for at least three weeks.

Today I’m grateful for:

* The beautiful smile I got from a 4 month old boy at the dentist’s office.

* The waitress at the café who remembered my name, and called it out when my beautifully green Matcha latté was ready. 

* Having two hands and being able to write this blog post, even though it hurts. 

P.S. I’ll let you know how it worked out.